sticks and stones can break my bones

but words can never hurt me

what a load of shit we try and sell children!

Words hurt - they hurt worse than just about anything.

I would gladly take a beating before I ever subjected myself to hateful words willingly.

some of the worst wounds i have ever faced were words said to sting - to hurt - to cut deep - and the did

some became the rules i lived by - some became the things i believed about myself, even though i could never quite see what they were saying

and still i battle believing the words people say in anger, or fear, or hatred. I still battle balancing the good words I hear daily with the hateful words I hear every now and again

amazing how one person can say something completely callous and uncaring and regardless of how little that person knows me - or how little significance they have in my daily life those words ring out in my head over and over despite the fact that i have heard words to the contrary every day of my life over and over again

and the good words stay with you - but they dont speak as loudly

i can remember people telling me they love me
or i am beautiful
why do you hide those eyes behind those dark glasses
nothing shines as bright as your smile
days just seem brighter when you are around
i love to hear you laugh
no one makes me laugh like you do
thanks for being my friend
thanks for being my momm
i love you

and yet - when it is quiet - if I am not careful - if i dont banish them - if i am not on guard against them i hear

you are so ugly
why would anyone love you
you are so lucky that anyone loves you
i will be more popular if you are not my friend
its a good thing the kids look like me -life will be easier for them that way
dont you ever shut up
what makes you think anyone ever wants to hear anything you say
snausages
because i have gotten to know you on many levels, and none of them are attractive

but those things are not the truth - not even close
and when it really gets quiet - and i remember to listen to the voice in my heart instead of the voices stuck in my head i know that

when i listen to those that love me instead of those that intend to just hurt me

i know

but when someone tells my darling daughter that words can't hurt - i have to look at her and tell her the truth

be careful what you say - you can't take it back - and words hurt harder and longer than any fist - any kick - any punch - any blow you will ever receive

I can also tell her that she can choose to believe what she wants

she can believe what she knows in her heart - or let the hateful words of petty pre-teens, angsty teenagers or angry sisters change who she believes herself to be.

sometimes there is a lesson in angry words - somethign to learn about how you react to things when you are reacting from fear -how you react to the world around you -

but never are there lessons to be learned about who you are at heart

never should you base your opinion of yourself on such hateful words
never should you judge your heart on those words
and never should you believe them about yourself - if you know that when you let your guard down - live in the moment and live in love you are a very different person